write. i want to write.
cry. i want to cry.
but. these tears are dry.
feel. i want to feel.
but. there's too much, i am numbed.
sad. am i?
everything bad, that should be it.

sometimes, i should never drink coffee.
sometimes, i should never let myself live.

there must be something wrong with me.
there should be something wrong with me.

so tired of feeling happy and sad at the same time.
so tired of being alive.
so tired of yelling at myself to get a grip.
so tired of failing.
so tired of having to write
because its the only way i could live this lie.

//

do ignore this^.
& if you ask why do i post this anyway, its cause i need someone to understand. but if you don't, then don't try.

it'll pass when the caffeine's off my system. whatever it may be.